Poison
by KerryReid
Summary: Severus and Hermione are together thanks to an insane marriage law. Can something caused by Umbridge really work out well?
1. Dear witch or wizard

Ministry of Magic,

Charring cross road,

London,

England,

Underground Residence, 3498774.

Hermione Jean Granger,

2310 Bodeux Street "W" Apartments,

London,

England,

SL9 3WK.

Dear witch or wizard,

As of this day, 23rd August 2007, a new law concerning all people between the ages of 17 and 70 will be in place.

"**Every unmarried individual between the ages of 17 and 70 will be required to marry and procreate accordingly. To ensure optimum stability and happiness in these marriages the ministry will be choosing partners for everybody, based on levels of compatability with each other, according to an approved and thorough survey. Once assigned a partner each couple is to sign their own personalised, legally binding, agreement which will act as a marriage certificate as well as various other forms of documentation. When signed, these forms shall be returned to the Ministries immediatley. Couples are then given a further 24hours to consummate their marriage and enter into unbreakable, holy matrimony. Each couple is to produce a minimum of two children within a four year period, the first of which should be conceived within the first 6months of marriage."** --- Atticus Orelius Blackstock, Minister for Magic.

Inclosed in this letter Sir or Madam will find a list of the rules and regulations that apply to the law. They will also find the compatability survery that is to be filled in and returned to the ministry no later than two days after it has being issued via the supplied Owlagram service.

Congratulations on your impending engagement,

Dolores Umbridge,

Head of the Population Purity Commity.

**Rules and Regulations**

1. Your best compatable partner not only depends on the survey results but also upon your blood status. Pairings that are accepted are as follows:

Muggleborn witches or wizards **to be paired with **witches or wizards that are of a half-blood background.

Pureblood witches or wizards **to be paired with **witches or wizards that are also of pureblood.

Half-blood witches or wizards **to be paired with **Muggleborns.

Failure to comply with these regulations could mean powerstripping and banishment from the wizarding world. Alternativley a sentence of upto 10years in Azakaban.

2. Marriages are to be upheld and honoured. Infedility will not be tolerated under any circumstances. Anybody found to be engaging in more than friendly hugs and kisses on the cheek [apart from with their spouses can face an Azkaban sentence of upto 15years. Alternatively, time in St.Mungo's for rehabilitation is also a punishment.

3. Failure to consummate the marriage will result in annulment. Anybody who has their marriage annulled will then face upto 6months in Azkaban and will be repaired with somebody who is not a compatable match. Only one annullment is allowed per person. Anybody found to have exceeded the limit will face upto 5years in Azkaban.

4. Failure to procreate within the time period the Ministry has set for all couples will result in both partners having a physical examination to check on their reproductive organs. If no problems are found they will be forcefully implanted and could face upto a year without the privelige of a wand or access to any magical means.

5. Homosexuals are not exempt from the law. Pregnancy in these cases will simply be from inplantation.

6. All people who are incapable of carrying children should present themselves for a ministry checkup. When given the allclear you may then be exempt from the law. People found to be using this as an excuse will be punished severely.

7. The ministry expects all couples to live together and share a bed. Expect a ministry check-up at anytime. If living circumstances are not deemed suitable couples are given 2weeks to fix it before punishment.

8. To ensure optimum results couples are to have intercourse at least twice during every period of ovulation until the first pregnancy.

This is reduced to twice during every three periods of ovulation for the second pregnancy, allthough failure to produce a second child has serious consequences.

9. Children born without any magical ability, or very little [squibs will not be counted as one of the two neccessary children. If a child is found to be a squib then it shall be adopted out by muggles within the first 48hours of life. Couples who produce two or more squibs will be seperated by the ministry and given alternative partners.


	2. Compatability

**Ministry supplied compatability survey.**

_**Please fill this form in truthfully and fully to ensure the best possible result for yourself. **_

**Full Name:** Hermione Jean Granger

**Age:** 18

**Starsign:** Virgo

**Blood Status:** Muggleborn

**Parents: **Jean Ingrid Granger [40 and Ian David Granger [46

**Siblings:** none

**School of Study:** Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry

**OWL results: **

**Transfiguration:** O

**Charms:** O

**Potions:** O

**Arithmancy: **O

**Ancient Runes:** O

**Muggle Studies:** O

**Herbology:** O

**Care of Magical Creatures:** O

**History of Magic:** O

**Astrology:** O

**Defence Against the Dark Arts:** E

**NEWT results: **

**Transfiguration: **O

**Charms: **O

**Potions:** O

**Arithmancy:** O

**Ancient Runes:** O

**Herbology:** O

**Defence Against the Dark Arts:** O

**Occupation:** Just out of fulltime education

**Height:** 5'7

**Weight:** 143lbs

**Hair colour:** Medium Brown

**Eye colour:** Brown

**Robesize:** 3

**Mugglesize:** 12

**Aspirations:** To have a successfull career in academics

**Other qualifications or recognised achievements:** Order of Merlin First class

**Hobbies: **Reading, fun, friends.

**Interests: **Reading, Potions, Academia etc...

**Dislikes:** Stupidity, childishness, lethargy, smalltalk, 'girly girls' etc...

**Number of children wanted: **1

**Attitude to childrearing: **I believe that education, stability and discipline are all impotant however it is vital to have sort of fun, caring relationship with the child or children.

**What would you like from this marriage:** Two children, companionship and conversation of the intellectual variety.

**Your attitude to romance: **I find all the soppy stuff to be tedious and slightly nausiating.

**Love: **I believe that mutual affection can be achieved within these arrangements but that love cannot neccessarily.

**Do you have any influential friends:** Harry Potter, The Weasley's, Minerva McGonnagall and Kingsley Shacklebolt.

**Preffered Height for mate: **Between 5'10 and 6'5

**Weight: **Is not important

**Hair colour:** Irrelevant

**Eye colour: **Irrelevant

**Robesize: **Under a 5

**Mugglesize: **Under the equivelant of a muggle 5

**Personality traits [please list no more than 15: **Intelligent, Sarcastic, Witty, Amicable, Kind, Generous, Outgoing.

**Age: **Under 42

**Looks or Personality:** Personality

**Ministry supplied compatability survey.**

_**Please fill this form in truthfully and fully to ensure the best possible result for yourself. **_

**Full Name:** Severus Orion Snape

**Age:** 38

**Starsign:** Leo

**Blood Status:** Halfblood

**Parents: **Eileen Hepzibah Prince [deceased and Tobias Articus Snape [65

**Siblings:** none

**School of Study:** Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry

**OWL results: **

**Transfiguration:** O

**Charms:** O

**Potions:** O

**Arithmancy: **O

**Ancient Runes:** O

**Herbology:** O

**Care of Magical Creatures:** O

**History of Magic:** O

**Astrology:** O

**Defence Against the Dark Arts:** O

**NEWT results: **

**Transfiguration: **O

**Charms: **O

**Potions:** O

**Arithmancy:** O

**Ancient Runes:** O

**Herbology:** O

**Defence Against the Dark Arts:** O

**Astrology: **O

**Occupation:** Potions Master at Hogwarts

**Height:** 6'2

**Weight:** 150lbs

**Hair colour:** Black

**Eye colour:** Black

**Robesize:** 2

**Mugglesize:** Small

**Aspirations:** To retire from teaching to work with potions

**Other qualifications or recognised achievements:** Order of Merlin First class

**Hobbies: **Reading, Potion making, Painting.

**Interests: **Reading, Potions, Academia.

**Dislikes:** Stupidity, childishness, lethargy, smalltalk and foolishness.

**Number of children wanted: **1

**Attitude to childrearing: **I believe children should have a good, friendly relationship with their parents but Education and Discipline are important.

**What would you like from this marriage:** Companionship, Amicability, Friendship, Intelligent Conversation.

**Your attitude to romance: **I believe it to be a waste of time but I am not adverse to candles and cuddling.

**Love: **I believe that this arrangement can only lead to affection and companionship. You cannot choose who you love.

**Do you have any influential friends:** Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonnagall.

**Preffered Height for mate: **Between 5'5 and 6'.

**Weight: **Between 135-175lbs.

**Hair colour:** Irrelevant

**Eye colour: **Irrelevant

**Robesize: **Between 3-5

**Mugglesize: **Between 12-16

**Personality traits [please list no more than 15: **Intelligence, Sarcasm, Kindness, Wit, Generosity.

**Age: **Under 38.

**Looks or Personality:** Personality is key

Hermione Jean Granger,

2310 Bodeux Street "W" Apartments,

London,

England,

SL9 3WK.

Dear Miss Granger,

We are pleased to inform you that after your successfull application we have found you a most suitable match.

Your fiance achieved 8 NEWTS [all O's and 10 OWLS [all O's. He is 38years of age and employed.

He is looking for Intelligence, Sarcasm, Kindness, Wit and Generosity. From your marriage he seeks Companionship, Friendship and Amicability as well as Stimulating Conversation. He shares your ideas on Love, Romance and Childrearing. He is looking for a woman between the 135-175lbs mark, between sizes 12-16 [or 3-5 who is between 5'5 and 6'. He says that "Personality is Key" and dislikes 'Stupidity, Foolishness and Childishness". He is 6'2, 150lbs, a size 2 [small with black hair.

If you wish to agree to this union please send us this letter back with your signature attached below.

Ministry of Magic, Marriage Office.

Hermione Jean Granger

HJ Granger

Severus Orion Snape,

The Dungeons,

Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry,

The Highlands,

Scotland,

Great Britain,

JN5 2SM.

Dear Master Snape,

We are pleased to inform you that after your successfull application we have found you a most suitable match.

Your fiance achieved 7 NEWTS [all O's and 11 OWLS [all O's with one E. She is 18years of age and currently seeking work or further education.

She is looking for Intelligence, Wit, Sarcasm and Caring. From the marriage she seeks Companionship, conversation and security. She shares your ideas on Love, Romance and Childrearing. She is looking for a man between the ages of 18-42. She seeks somebody between the heights of 5'10 to 6'5. She is indifferent to physical appearance and dislikes "Stupidity, lethargy and childishness". She is 5'7 with brown hair and eyes. She weights 143lbs and wears a size 3 [12.

If you wish to agree to this union please send us this letter back with your signature attached below.

Ministry of Magic, Marriage Office.

Severus Orion Snape

_Severus Snape_

_To my wife,_

It seems strange to me that we are married without ever having seen each other or even knowing each others names. I understand that we have until 4pm tomorrow to have consummated our marriage and move in with each other.

As this is the case I thought I would write to you to find out what time would be at your convenience to meet. I also hope that you won't find me to bold in asking you about yourself before we meet?

Yours faithfully[how ironic,

_Severus Snape_

To my Husband,

I find the situation that we are in rather laughable myself. Having discovered your identity I am neither put out or put off by our marriage, but I am letting you know that it is not to late to pull out if you wish to do so. After all, as you said, we have roughly 21hours before we have to have decided properly.

I have no plans for tomorrow so any time which is suitable to you, should you wish to proceed, is acceptable, but please don't make it to early. I am not an early mornings person.

I would not find you to bold in inquiring after me. I'm not sure what you really want to know so i'll keep it trivial as most of the important stuff was covered by the survey and the following information letter. Well, as you may know, I am a muggleborn. My favourite colours are Deep purples and greens, something which I am sure most people are shocked to discover. I attended Hogwarts school so unfortunatley I am a former pupil (are you scared yet?). My favourite animal is the Otter. My favourite genre of music, is classic rock (I bet that comes as a suprise). I hate muggle television (especially reality TV!) and you'd be suprised at how different I am from the image people pick up of me.

I am sure you have guessed my identity by now Professor, my handwriting is rather a large giveaway.

Reply with your decision as to the direction of the marriage as soon as possible please,

Yours,

Hermione J. Granger ... or is it Snape now?

Hermione,

I admit I am rather astonished at this strange turn of events but I am willing to see it through. You are an attractive, intelligent young woman and I see no reason that we cannot along suitably well.

Perhaps we should do this tonight, My floo network will be open to you between 11 and 11:30pm so if you would like to come then...?

As for your responses to my questions you are right I am shocked. I never thought I would meet a Gryffindor who did not love red and gold, the lion and cheesy ballads. It will be interesting to see what you are really like if you are not so much the girl you potrait.

I don't know if you care but I feel it neccessary to inform you of some things as well. My favourite colours are Deep greens and the obvious, black, allthough I am not adverse to crimson tones (shocked?). My favourite animal is the panther, but the raven is also rather nice. Our music taste is quite the same but I lean more towards the modern myself. Muggle television is an attrocity I agree and I think you have gathered thus far just how different I am from my classroom persona.

I hope to see you later Mrs.Snape,

Yours,

Severus

Severus,

See you at 11ish,

Hermione.


	3. The price of intelligence

At 11o'clock precisely Hermione Granger, Nay, Snape stepped out of the black marble fireplace that was center of the wall of what Hermione presumed to be Severus' living room. It was large and lavishly decorated with forrest green walls and darken wooden floorboards. Before the fire was a large black sofa and the walls on either side of the fire were lined with bookshelves, all of which were brimming with leather bound titles. A small, dark, dining table stood in one corner and a workdesk in the other. A circular rug lay between the hearth of and the couch and the room looked very elegant. Severus was sat on the couch waiting for her and he smiled when she arrived. She was dressed in simple muggle attire, a pair of dark blue jeans with a black tanktop and ankleboots. In her hands were several, obviously enchanted, miniscule bags and suitcases which she set down on the floor,

"Hi" She greeted him nervously,

"Hermione" he replied, inclining his head slightly. He watched as she took in her surroundings, "Sufficient I hope?" she nodded and he smiled, patting the seat next to him and indicating for her to sit down, "This is your home too now Hermione you can do as you wish. But please..." he begged softly, "Do not leave to much of a mess around. I am instinctivley neat"

"Yes Professor" she replied automatically, moaning at herself, "Sorry it's a habit"

"Don't apologise, but please, call me Severus. Or Sev if you must"

"Mya" she told him, "It's easier that Hermione and 'Mione is just awful!" They smiled at each other and he stood up offering her a hand,

"Let me show you around" His rooms were not extensive but they were quite roomy. Leading off of the living was a small corridor which led to an office, a bathroom and a bedroom. The bathroom was astounding, all done in black marble. It was a spacious, clawfoot bath and she noticed the jet hoses built in. There was a seperate shower cubicle, two lavish sinks and a toilet in the corner. Behind the sinks was a large mirror and underneath a cabinet full of medical potions and toiletries.

The bedroom was exquisite. There was a large, dark chest of draws in the corner and a full length mirror stood next to it. In the center of the room up against the far wall was a massive four poster bed made of rich, chocolate mahogany. The sheets and covers were made from shimmering silk in an emerald green. The hangings around the bed were a shiny black and the whole thing seemed to scream of decadence,

"It's a beautiful place" she told him truthfully and he smiled,

"Suprised?"

"Very" she admitted. They looked at each other awkwardly for a few minutes before Severus checked his watch. It was nearing midnight,

"Hermione, we still have 14hours to back out of this you know" she shook her head,

"If it's okay Severus I think we should see how this goes. We are, after all, the most compatable match and I think this could become fairly pleasant" He nodded to her, "I also think" she continued, "that there is no time like the present. Unless, you've changed your mind about this, shouldn't we 'seal the deal'?" Severus laughed at her turn of phrase and glanced down at his feet. She sensed his awkwardness and blushed,

"It's okay, I mean if you don't want too..." he shook his head and walked toward her, placing his hands on her shoulders softly and running them down her arms,

"Its just a bit uncomfortable" he told her quietly and she responded by placing her hands on the small of his back and resting her head against his chest briefly, but she knew they had to do this and so did he, wether it was awkward or not. She looked up at him and pressed up on the balls of her toes brushing her lips against his feather lightly as he bent down his head to greet her. It was quick and barely anything but it broke through some of their barriers. He brought his lips down to meet hers again and this time they were both a little more demanding and harder in the kiss. Her tongue brushed it's away along his bottom lip deftly and he caught it between his lips sucking softly. She mewed a little and he did it again. He deepened the kiss and his own tongue was soon flitting softly into her mouth, brushing the roof and tracing her teeth. She moved one hand up and intwined it in his hair, curling it slowly between her fingers and playing with it happily. His own hands had wandered, one to her hip and the other to stroke her softspot, the junction between her neck and shoulders. She pulled out from the kiss to breathe and he took his chance, his lips leaving a trail of kisses down her jawline and onto the softspot which he sucked softly, nipping it and soothing with his tongue. One of her hands had found its way beneath his shirt and was running itself all over his torso. She began to undo the buttons of his shirt and when she was done he pulled her top off over her shoulders, exposing her plain black halfcup bra. She moaned when his hands began to cup her breasts lightly and she unhooked her bra, quickly divesting herself of the intruding instrument and letting him pinch her rosy, erect nipples playfully. His mouth moved down and soon one of the delectable buds was between his teeth as he lathered it with attention, his fingers tweaking the other one. She pushed him off gently and he looked offended until she dropped the zipper of his pants and pulled them off. She did the same thing to herself and they stood, he in his straining black boxers, her in her sexy black, lacy thong. She kissed him again deeply and she let a hand roam down so that she could cup him through his shorts. She let the hand move underneath the fabric and grabhold of this throbbing member. He groaned into her mouth and she smirked, moving away and pulling down his boxers before dropping to her knees,

"Mya" he groaned, "You don't have to Ahhh" he gasped as she flicked her tongue along the underside of him, stopping at the tip so that she could slip her tongue along his opening before taking the head into her mouth and sucking gently. She let her mouth engulf as much of his length as she could a few times, which was a fair size, before standing up and moving backwards away from him and towards the bed,

"Still awkward?" she asked him playfully, and he nodded,

"Just for different reasons" he said as he lunged forward knocking her backwards onto the bed as he kneeled over her. His lips found hers again quickly as his hands quickly rid her of her knickers. One hand cupping her left breast gently the other wound its way down through her neatly trimmed curls and onto her swollen nub. He stroked it a few times before circling around it playfully, purposely avoiding the most sensitive area. She growled at him and he smiled before pressing down against it and moving his fingers idly. She purred and they locked lips once more, his hardness pulsating against her moist inner thigh. He moved himself up so that he was teasingly brushing her outerlips,

"Your not a...?" he asked uncertainly and when she shook her head he plunged into her deeply moaning at the feel of her hot, tight, warmth encompassing him. He drew back until he was tickling her entrance again causing her to buck in frustration before delving harshly in once more. Her hands wandered down to grab at his buttocks as she pressed him into her further. She pushed down against him as he thrust and mewed happily at the feeling him buried deeply inside her. His pace quickened and soon they were both breathing ruggedly. He slammed into her fast and hard and she groaned throatily,

"More" she whimpered helplessly, "Please Sever-Ahh" he thrust again manically pushing into her whole heartedly and relishing the sound of her smashing against him. He loved the way she begged for him and lowered his mouth to bite at her nipple harshly, "Oh god" she moaned, bucking against him as her muscles clamped down around him,

"Hermione" he growled deeply as he pushed back into her, savouring the feel of her milking him so deliciously. A few more long, hard strokes and he was spent, collapsing on top of her and sucking on her nipple.


End file.
